By Frank J. Diekmann
As I continue to clean out all the all the remaining scrawls left in the Reporter’s Notebook from a 2023 in which Taylor Swift generated more revenue in just one year than the individual assets of 90% of credit unions, here’s some of what I was able to decipher:
One Question to Ask
Among the too-numerous-to-count observations worth sharing made during the most recent Underground meeting in Las Vegas sponsored by Mitchell, Stankovic & Associates—all of which I wish I could share here--was one from Jan Anthony, VP-cybersecurity and risk with ThinkStack.
Anthony told an audience of credit union leaders, “I am going to give you one interview question to ask the technologist you are hiring: What is something you don’t know about, and what is your plan in the next 90 days to learn about it?”
Anthony, who spent 20 years in the Air Force working in cyberdefense and technology, noted at the time she spoke she had been in credit unions for seven months “and in that time I have worked with six credit unions on a cyber-incidents. You are not ready to respond to a breach to a cyber-incident. (The fraud ranged in size), but one of them was $280,000 being wired out of a credit union to a fraud account. You might say that would never happen at our credit union. I will tell you four months ago that CEO would have told you the same thing.”
Her words would prove to be prescient. Following the ransomware attack that led to outages at 60 credit unions nationally, Anthony was featured in CUToday.info offering advice and strategies here and here.
You can find the full coverage of the Underground event here.
Just Your Basic Shade of Beige
During one recent meeting, a good-sized audience of credit union leaders were asked for what they see ahead in 2024. As the moderator of the session summed up, “Most agree 2024 is going to be ‘meh.’”
That poll was taken before it became more apparent the Fed will appears more inclined to start reducing rates next year, which, depending on the state of your portfolio, might push some folks into being a little more meh, a little less meh territory.
Making a Federal Case Out of a Conundrum
Government and regulators are frequently criticized (and yeah, it’s often deserved) for regulating in response to the last crisis, not the next. But regulators face some inherent challenges that, ironically, in a $6.3-trillion federal budget, comes down to spending.
It's a dilemma that was addressed by Randal Quarles, vice chair for supervision with the Fed, who told the recent Money 20/20 meeting in Las Vegas, that building big technology projects, no matter how well they are designed, is almost impossible for the federal government.
“We can’t pay the tech people enough in cash or equity,” he said, referring to the advantage held by private companies. “You can’t compete. There are limitations to the government process. By the time a government entity has built a technology it will be fine for five years ago, when the process began, and it won’t be able to be updated well enough. I think ultimately there has to be significant involvement of the private sector.”
This Isn’t a Metaphor
When cybersecurity is discussed in credit unions, your bingo card will fill pretty fast if it includes a whole bunch of military metaphors such as “battlefield” and “war.” But one expert who has high-level experience in both cyber-threats and credit unions says the references are appropriate, especially when it comes to the attacks taking place on financial institutions, which he said often have their roots in countries at (silent) war with each other.
Lt. Gen. (Ret.) Bradford J. “B.J.” Shwedo, the former director for command, control, communications and computers/Cyber and CIO with the Pentagon, and who also is SVP-special programs with PenFed Credit Union in Virginia, reviewed numerous threats to credit unions during remarks at the Defense Credit Union Council meeting that you can read more about here.
Schwedo shared a few things that should help you to spend more time staring at the ceiling at night, including when he asked if anyone in the audience at the meeting in Colorado Springs knows who oversees security around pipelines in the U.S. The answer: the TSA.
“They have very few people for 2.7 million miles of pipe,” he added.
And how much do you want to bet at least some of that pipe is carrying more than four ounces of liquid?
This Is What A Headline Designed to be Read By Humans Who Use Their Eyes Looks Like
Nearly two years ago while part of a panel addressing a meeting being held in Washington, I was asked why more credit union/CUSO press releases don’t get much in the way of coverage in various media outlets.
I responded by saying there are many reasons, and while I can’t speak for others in the Fourth Estate, my primary reaction to many of the communications I receive from credit unions is to wonder how the person who wrote this stuff ever got out of high school English class.
And for that, I apologized. Because I meant to say elementary school English class.
Alas, credit unions aren’t alone in sending out bloated, lead-burying, syntax-taxing, CEO-butt-kissing, cringingly self-congratulatory press releases, as the piece of puffery from the State of New Hampshire related to a new report around crypto, in which an observational gem was shared to note crypto has "...many potentially important applications in our human societies and economies…”
Human societies? What other societies are currently engaged in crypto? Prairie dogs? Apparently, you get paid by the word in government. I’m sorry: human government.
Speaking of Which, You’d Like to Think It’s Implied, But…
I recently received a press release announcing a credit union would be holding a Kids Day for its “youth members.” I like to think that’s implied, but I realize for some, it’s not.
A Bug That Doesn’t Involve Software
The hard-core philosophy types within the credit union community will sometimes say they are doing “God’s work,” and in at least one case a credit union did face something of Biblical proportions this year. In case you missed it, a plague of crickets overwhelmed northern Nevada and one CU that was not smote in the process actually lived to tell it’s story. You can read more here. And if you just want to see the video shot by Elko FCU, go here.
Well, the Latter Doesn’t Appear as Professional on Your LinkedIn Profile
Asked one compliance professional of an audience recently, “If you are in compliance, what is your real job---to enable growth, or to keep people out of prison?”
Frank J. Diekmann is Cooperator in Chief of CUToday.info and can be reached at Frank@CUToday.info. Mr. Diekmann is also author of several new book, including the brand new “The Last Lyric,” a humorous satire about a murder investigation at the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame in which every line of dialogue is either a classic pop/rock song title or lyric. Available on Amazon, Apple iBook, Barnes & Noble and Smashwords. Mr. Diekmann is also author of a non-fiction compilation of the very best & worst he has seen and heard in covering more than 500 CU meetings and conferences, “501 Name Tags: How Everything You Need to Know About Business Can Be Learned at a Conference & Forgotten in the Trade Show.” It is available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Apple, Lulu, and Smashwords